Dear Line Manager,
For the times you treated your full and part time staff differently, I forgive you. For the time you initiated a team discussion about the effects and risks of treating an increasing number of bariatric patients without appropriate equipment. I thank you.
For the time you belittled and intimidated me because I produced an evidence about the manual handling risks in our service. I forgive you : I think you were projecting your own failings and were also bullied by others.For the 15yrs of professional working together: I thank you.
For time you disbelieved the pain and psychological distress I was suffering. I forgive you. For refusing me a reference. I forgive you.
To HR Lead,
For your verbal and aggressive manner, your lies, lack of compassion, disrespect, and failure to correctly process references. For your unprofessionalism and for the severe emotional trauma that your behaviour caused me. I forgive you. And I also thank you… because the counselling I received to help me recover and rebuild my mental health has reinvigorated me.
To the Investigating Lead,
Thank you for treating me with respect and compassion. I trusted you to be impartial, fair and thorough. I was wrong. You did not find evidence because you did not look. You chose to protect your fellow manager. You have greatly disappointed me. I forgive you for toe-ing the party line .
To the Chief Nurse,
For contacting a prospective employer and trying to reverse a job offer . THANK YOU. SO MUCH!
The key tenets of that job: accountability, upholding NMC Code, and not being afraid to speak out was underscored by your attempt to derail my career . It was masterful. THANK YOU ! So when my new employer told me that they did not trust that you to be a fair and trustworthy referee , I realised that MY honesty and integrity did win out in the end!
In 5 yrs , you never spoke directly to me. During the stressful months of the Grievance/ Health and Safety concern, you remained elusive, meeting my union rep, but never me. Denying me an exit interview you later sent me the `findings’ of your `independent’ investigator. 1 year later you tried to intimidate me by threatening legal action if I communicated with any of your 1500 employees ! For failing me, I forgive you. For failing my patient: Unforgivable.
Dear `Independent’ Investigator,
Did you really expect to find evidence of bullying, intimidation, poor management practices, in a desk based review, in an organisation where most employees fear speaking up? Apparently, the reports of my GP, Occupational Health nurse, Union rep and myself were not evidence enough. I forgive your shortsightedness .
I forgive your incompetencies, lack of integrity, lack of vision, but I cannot forgive you for putting yourselves before patient safety and the nurses among you have contravened your NMC Code. My forgiveness does not absolve you of your accountability .
Former Employee and Anti-bullying Advocate.